Saturday, May 24, 2014

through the Evergreen park

In its origins this was to be a place free from the judgement of audience.  In its infancy the intention was to serve as equal parts journal and creative outlet.  As all things in life should do, there has been an organic evolution of ARTV.  It is still unclear to me where this thing is going.  I am not sure if this place is a necessity the way it once was.  The vernacular that I once whispered to myself in the safe dark confines of my tiny basement apartment is now read, recognized and appreciated by more people than I can count.  This platform has, for sometime, acted as an unintentional whetstone.
There is still a long way to go before I am a great writer but for the first time I recognize that that is the direction I am headed.  Does a polymath set out to be such?  Or is a similar condition in which I have found myself entangled in?  Often I wonder what it would be like to be the very best at something but it has never been a pursuit that has interested me enough to follow.  Through more endeavors than I care to discuss I have achieved a reasonable level of success and moved on to another, completely abandoning the previous.  From the earliest age I have found passion in things.  Those things become all consuming until the point in which I know that I have mastered them and then I become uninterested.  The same can be said of many of my relationships.  There have been only three women that I have loved in such a way that they could cause me pain.  My belief is that was because they remained illusive and unconquerable.
One of my only fears is that this idiosyncrasy will leave me forever alone, never having mastered any aspect of life.  For now I will write.  I will do so until the entire world knows me for being a great writer, when that happens I will grow tired of writing and evolve once again to the foothill of another seemingly unconquerable peak.  In time I will summit all that life will present to me, all the while truly and forever alone.

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