Holy hell, I can only imagine that this is what heroine feels like! What an outright rush. Sensations that have been hibernating for what seems like eons brought to life by an unlikely source. Let's call this the prologue.
This nonsense has been going on for far too long with out a direction. A place of platitudinous bloviation that served a purpose for a while, but a weak one at best. My cognitive dissonance is currently a double bass line that would give Joey Jordison a hard on. Self conflict has had me by the throat for weeks and I'm fucking sick of it. I would love to make some comment about how that is all about to end... today's the day... I'm going to attack the world with confidence.... blah blah blah. Nope. I have resolved to embracing the conflicting notions. I've got ring side seats to these shoulder angels going toe to toe in a bare knuckle fight to the death. The glorious part is I don't give a bag of bloody dicks which one wins. I'm just here for the ruckus. So dip your taped fists in glass little shoulder devil, I payed for blood shed and that is what I expect!
What the fuck is he talking about?? If you haven't figured it out by now you should just stop reading now because it's only going to get more tumultuous from here. So far this little shit show of a project has hardly scraped the skin of conscious thought. Well, I've got this axe sharpened and have already resolved to plunging it into the skull of my id. I am going to attempt to do so without the assistance of hallucinogens, but hell, if that's what it takes.... Besides I'm still technically in college and unless I'm off the mark, most of these useless sacks of fuck are on whatever mind altering substances that they can get their liberal little phalanges on.
An immediate reaction to this is, what a narcissistic piece of potty mouthed shit this fellow is. My response to that will never be anything more than nothing at all. Frankly if you think that the word "fuck" is any less expressive than the word Messiah than you haven't been paying attention. I really don't give three quarters of a monks shit if you think this is dribble. Thanks for coming out, you can pick up your free pens and water bottles on your way out. No, I won't validate your parking pass. Don't forget to buckle up before driving yourself into oncoming traffic. And that brings up my first attempt at something poignant. I didn't lose a minute of sleep over this whole theater massacre thing. So some guy went into a theater a couple of miles from my house and shot 70 people, killing a dozen of them. Does that suck? Yes. That is shitty. But for who? Not me. I wasn't effected by this in the slightest. I got to sit and listen to everyone and their mother try to relate this event to themselves. Hearing shit like, "Well I can't even go to work today, I am just too shook up. My cousins friend knew someone that used to work in that theater!" You selfish, slothful prick! Why do people feel the need to make that kind of shit about them. Look, I have been smack dab in the middle of some massacres before so maybe I'm just calloused to it but the fact is I would be pissed if some asshole that was hundreds, if not thousands of miles away tried to gain sympathy for those events. Which brings me to some shit that I will certainly be covering later, stolen valor and indecent piles of toad regurgitation that claim post traumatic stress without a pixie dick of an actual traumatic experience. Do pixies have dicks?
Look, I'm not a bad guy. I don't wish that bad things would happen to innocent people. The events of July 20th, 2012 were no doubt a tragedy. All I am saying is that it didn't keep me from driving to work and making inappropriate jokes. In fact, I recall one of my coworkers commenting about how awful the whole thing is, and my only response was, "Yeah, I mean we all have that one person that we would like to shoot in the head but a dozen... that's a bit excessive!" But that's what we are all about in this country... Let's see how big we can get our value meal, cause it's not REALLY a value until I have diabetes!
It's 2:30 in the afternoon on a Tuesday and I am still in my under ware, what does that tell you? First it should tell you that I really don't care and that my job is better than yours! Now, if someone went directly into my place of business and shot a bunch of people that I know, I would likely get a little upset. I actually like those people, sometimes they bring me snacks (Thanks Kristy!) I would have a reason to react because my life had actually been impacted, both emotionally and financially. The simple truth is that life already has so many moments that are emotionally draining, why in the name of Peter Pan would you waste precious catecholamines on an event that you can have zero influence or impact on? Sure, donate to the families if you feel it can help but don't use the event as an excuse to get out of work or even worse, mope around acting like it is the end of the world expecting others to use up their emotional reserves to comfort your sorry ass. Holy fucking run on sentence! Fuck it, I'm sure that the two people that started reading this have long since stopped.
The entire point of this tirade is don't be a fucking leech. Don't, under any circumstance take something that doesn't belong to you, and that includes undeserved sympathy. Having empathy is one thing but by Unicorn please know the difference. Does it suck when twelve people get killed, sure. On average, 600 people a year are murdered in LA alone and I don't hear people in my class whining that they need an extension on their paper because of how distraught they are. They have about the same level of personal connection with that Crip that took five rounds to his face on his 15th birthday as they did to anyone of the people who were slain in that theater. Foolish hypocrisy and an unhealthy need for attention are two things I just don't have a stomach for, now dollar tacos.... That is something worth finally putting my pants on for.
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